Emotional Flutter

I have this little box
Filled with memories of you.
Sometimes I open it
And remember the times we shared.
It makes me feel whole, just as much as empty,
Happy, just as much as sad,
And, loved just as much as lonely.

As I pick up the scattered memories,
I feel as though I am picking up
Pieces of my heart.
I smell them, feel them,
Touch them, and remember them.

When I put them together,
I feel as though as I am constructing a mold of my heart,
Replacing each piece of the frame.
Every time I open the box,
The frame gets stronger and less fragile.

It makes me smile to know that
At one time I was loved and that I loved.
Many pieces remind me of the pain you gave me,
But with sorrow and grief... comes power and triumph
And I feel as though I have won.

You may have broke my heart
But you taught me something;
If you love someone, really really love them,
Love will give you the strength to let them go.

Satu lagu yang ga akan pernah dia denger. Seribu rasa yang tidak tersampaikan. Sejuta kata tak terucap.

Akhir2 ini banyak banget temen gua yg putus. Ada yg udah pacaran 2 taun, ada juga yg udah 4 taun. Alesannya macem2, mulai dari perbedaan yg tidak dapat dijembatani, hingga tidak ada approval dari orang tua. Memang bener ya kata orang, kalo hidup ini ga sepenuhnya berada di tangan kita. Kadang kita udah berusaha yg terbaik, tapi tetep aja yg namanya perbedaan dan perpisahan, adalah bagian yg tidak terpisahkan dalam hidup ini. Ada baiknya, kalo kita belajar MERELAKAN.

Someone once told me : "If you don't like something, if you can't change it, change the way you think about it" Mungkin itulah yg dimaksud dengan MERELAKAN. Gua tau, ga gampang untuk merelakan, apalagi jika menyangkut masalah cinta. Kadang ada dorongan dari dalam diri untuk terus berusaha mengubah yg telah terjadi, meskipun kadang hal itu malah membuat rasa sakit yg ada semakin dalam.

Gua ada sedikit tulisan mengenai "MERELAKAN", found it on one of my old school notebook...

LETTING GO

To let go does not mean to stop caring, it means I can't do it for someone else.
To let go is not to cut myself off, it's the realization I can't control another.
To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.
To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To let go is not to try to change or blame another, ; it's to make the most of myself.
To let go is not to care for,but to care about.
To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To let go is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To let go is not to be in the middle arranging the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own
destinies.
To let go is not to be protective, it's to permit another to face reality.
To let go is not to deny, but to accept.
To let go is not to nag, scold or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings, and correct them.
To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires ; but to take each day as it comes, and cherish myself in it.
To let go is not to criticize and regulate anybody ; but to try to become what I dream I can be.
To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To let go is to fear less and love more...


TERJEMAHAN :
Merelakan tidak berarti melupakan, tidak memikirkan, atau tidak mengacuhkan.
Ia tidak meninggalkan perasaan marah, cemburu, ataupun sesal.
Merelakan tidak berarti menang dan tidak pula kalah.
Ia bukan tentang harga diri dan bukan juga tentang kesan yang ditimbulkan.
Dan ia tidak terobsesi ataupun tenggelam dalam masa lalu.
Merelakan bukan berarti membendung kenangan atau memikirkan hal-hal sedih.
Ia tidak meninggalkan kekosongan, sakit hati, atau kesedihan.
Ia tidak berarti menyerah ataupun mundur pasrah.
Merelakan tidak sama dengan kehilangan, dan jelas bukan kekalahan.

Merelakan berarti bisa menyimpan kenangan, tapi juga bisa mengatasinya dan melanjutkan kehidupan.
Berpikiran terbuka dan yakin akan masa depan.
Merelakan berarti menerima, belajar, menarik pengalaman, dan terus bertumbuh.
Merelakan berarti merasa bersyukur atas segala pengalaman yang membuatmu tertawa, menangis, dan berkembang.
Ia berkaitan dengan segala yang kaumiliki saat ini, di masa lalu, dan yang akan segera kaumiliki lagi kelak.

Merelakan berarti mempunyai keberanian untuk menerima perubahan dan kekuatan untuk terus berjalan.
Merelakan berarti menuju kedewasaan,
Menyadari bahwa kadang kala hati ini bisa menjadi obat yang paling ampuh.
Merelakan berarti membuka pintu, membersihkan jalan, dan membebaskan diri sendiri.

---

Nasehatin orang sih gampang, padahal gua sendiri juga ga semudah itu merelakan. Gua ga bisa merubah keadaan, ataupun perasaan dia yg udah berubah, gua sadar banget akan hal itu. Karena itu, mulai saat ini, gua harus buka lembaran baru. Saatnya memutar kembali waktu yg telah terhenti dalam kesenyapan, saatnya menggugah kembali hati yg beku dalam kesunyian.

Ada satu lagu yg gua bikin khusus buat dia. Sayangnya dia ga akan pernah denger lagunya. Tapi ya oh well, it's time to move on, gua ga bisa terus2an menyeret beban ini ke mana2. Biarkan lagu ini dan semua kepahitan sirna seiring berjalannya waktu, menyisakan manisnya cinta yg menggema di relung kalbu hati yg remuk redam ini.


I believe that if things are meant to be
They'll come true
And the past will set me free
I believe and I know deep in my heart
That you will see
In the time we are apart

I've not let you go
I've kept you here with me
Even though it seems like I've moved on
The distance still hurts me

But if the years go by and you forget me
Know that I love you
And that I cherish all the days
That you were here with me and I
Was beside you there inside your heart
Warm in summer time
No, I can't let go
Thinking of what might have been

I believe
Even though I must leave you
There will be a time we meet again
If it's true
That your heart is meant for me
Then fate will see that in distant days we'll meet

And I'll love you still
But will you still love me?
Knowing what I've done to you
But not how much you mean to me

And if the years go by and you forget me
Know that I miss you
And that I'll look back on the days
That you were here with me and I
Was beside you there inside your heart
Warm in memories
No, I can't let go
Thinking of what might have been

A wounded heart is hardest to forgive
But I'll still try to make it right
For every day that I have been
Away from you
I'll kiss you twice
And tenderly I'll pledge to stay

But if the pain has made your heart
Forget me
Know that I'll miss you
And that I'll look back on the days
That you were here with me
And I was beside you there inside your heart
Warm in memories
I'll let go of you,
Wishing for what might have been
I'll let go of you,
Wishing for what might have been

PS : Lagunya sekarang bisa didengerin di sini ---> http://soundcloud.com/claudeckenni/i-believe